Tulsi Vivah is the marriage of the sacred basil plant, tulsi, to Lord Vishnu. It is celebrated in homes and temples with the same care as a human wedding: the plant is dressed as a bride, a Shaligram stone or an image of Krishna plays the groom, and there are garlands, music, sweets and a feast. For many families it marks the end of the four-month sleep of Vishnu, the Chaturmas, and the start of the season in which weddings are held again.
Month and tithi
The festival is the Shukla Dwadashi of Kartika, the twelfth day of the bright fortnight, which comes the day after Prabodhini Ekadashi, when Vishnu is said to wake. The Dwadashi page describes the tithi. Families vary in the day they hold the wedding: some keep it on Prabodhini Ekadashi itself, some on Dwadashi, and some choose any day up to Kartika Purnima. The table follows Dwadashi.
The story
The tradition, as it appears in the Padma Purana and other Puranic retellings, tells of Vrinda, a woman of great devotion and purity, who was married to the asura king Jalandhara. Her faithfulness kept him invulnerable, and the gods could not defeat him. In the story Vishnu took the form of Jalandhara to break her vow, and when she learned of it, Vrinda cursed him to become a stone, which is the Shaligram. After her death the tulsi plant grew from the place where she was cremated, and Vishnu promised to be married to her every year. The details vary in different regions, and the story is read as a story about devotion and about the sacredness of the plant.
How the wedding is held
In the evening a sugar cane mandap is built around the tulsi pot in the courtyard or on the balcony. The plant is decorated with a red cloth, bangles, a bindi and flowers, and a Shaligram or a small Krishna image is placed beside it. The family does a puja with lamps, fruit, sugar cane and sweets, and the ritual of the vivah, including the exchange of garlands and the mangalashtak verses, is performed by a priest or the family elder. In some families a thread is tied between the bride and groom, and in some the oldest daughter acts as the bride’s party. Prasad is shared among the neighbours.
In Maharashtra and Gujarat the festival is a large and joyful event, often celebrated by whole housing societies. In the north, women sing wedding songs and the day sometimes ends with firecrackers.
How the day is fixed
The rule used here follows Drik Panchang: the festival is on the civil day on which Dwadashi is in force at sunrise. If it is in force at two sunrises, the first is taken. The table shows the date and the times at which Dwadashi begins and ends in each city. Many families also hold the wedding in the evening, because the tradition suits that time of day.
Why cities differ
The tithi starts and ends at one instant, but sunrise is at different clock times in each city. A Dwadashi that ends a few minutes before sunrise in one city may be in force at sunrise in another, which puts the festival a day apart. Cities in Australia and the Americas sometimes differ from India for this reason. Use the any-city tool for places not in the table.
A calm note
The plant itself matters more than the setting. A small tulsi pot with a lamp and a few flowers and a plate of sweets is a complete observance, and living away from a courtyard is no obstacle. If your family keeps the wedding on a different day, follow it.